im having a threesome with these popsicles
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
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