He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
