There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
she smelled like a LAN party
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Randomize
