One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
