im having a threesome with these popsicles
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
