Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
