Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
