Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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