That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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