My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize