I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
