i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
True strength comes from lack of pants
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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