if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
