I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
