Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
