May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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