In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
