You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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