That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
