Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
