Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
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