I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
So apparently I’m into choking now
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Randomize
