Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
