so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
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