Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Randomize