erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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