Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
