i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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