Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
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