will power is for people who don't want to get laid
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
