I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
