I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Do you remember whose house we're in?
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Randomize