He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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