I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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