I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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