so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
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