Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
