Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
