Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
