We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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