My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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