living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize