My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
i out mim tonsoeep
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