I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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