i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
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