I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize