dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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