that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
You did what with his pubic hair?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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