cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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