He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Randomize
